Sunday, February 14, 2010

The Virtue of Lying.....

This weekend, we have friends visiting from out of town. Well, actually...family. My mother's ex-husband's daughter and her husband and kids from California. Ruanita and the kids and I went to the mall and to lunch with them yesterday. At lunch, my mom and sister were discussing what they were going to do for the afternoon to entertain our guests. Ruanita and I were exhausted after wrestling with the kids at the Mall of America...on a Saturday...on a 3-day weekend...waiting in line to ride rides. What the hell were we thinking? We planned on taking the kids home, passing out, and laying camotose the remainder of the afternoon. The group decided that they were going to go to the hotel my ex-step-sister (for lack of a better term) was staying at to take the kids swimming. My mom volunteered to take Lucas since Ruanita and I didn't want to go. Lucas LOVES swimming, so we didn't want to pass up on an opportunity to let him swim during the long, cold dead of winter. Unfortunately, the twins are more of a handful and my mom didn't feel comfortable watching them at the pool. Understandable. We left the restaurant with my mom saying she would be at our house shortly to pick up Lucas.

Ruanita and I absolutely did NOT want to go swimming. The thought of it made me shudder. Therefore, I was left with the task of telling the kids that Lucas was going swimming and Sophie and Nicholas were not. I debated on the walk to the van exactly HOW I was going to tell them. This could get ugly. We strapped them all safely into their car seats....it is harder to riot when you are strapped to a seat. Then I did what any good mother would do....I took a deep breath, turned to face the children, and....lied through my teeth. I told them that Sophie and Nicholas were too sick to go swimming this time, so they would have to stay home with Ruanita and I. In my defense, this was only a partial lie. Nicholas had had a hacking cough for a few days, so he really did not need to swim. Sophie, on the other hand, simply had a tiny bit of a runny nose. She certainly wasn't "sick." She looked at me....at first with shock. Then I saw a realization settle into her eyes. Wait a minute....I could tell she was thinking...I am not sick! Of course, once I told her this, I had to stick with my story. I certainly couldn't tell her the truth....that mommy had no desire to go swimming. That the hair on mommy's legs was long enough to french braid. That mommy would need at least three days and a weed wacker to make herself presentable in a bathing suit! So I stuck to my story. I explained that the hotel did not allow kids with runny noses to swim. That swimming with a runny nose would only manage to make her sicker. I told her that she would get to go the next time...knowing full well that there would not be a "next time" since our guests would be heading back to California first thing Tuesday morning. Sophie glared at the back of my head the entire way home. I could feel her seething stare. If looks could kill, I am afraid I would six feet under right now. Did I feel bad about it? I felt a tiny twinge of guilt. However, the guilt was NOT enough to compel me to shave my legs and put on a bathing suit.

In typical preschooler fashion, she forgot about it pretty quickly. She no longer hates mommy. I am even making it up to her today. We are going to take her to see The Princess and the Frog. I avoided putting on a bathing suit AND I am getting movie popcorn today. Sometimes, as a mom, lying is the only way to go....

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