The Story of Two Detail-Oriented Dynamos

Today was the first official day of Ruanita being a stay-at-home mom. I have been informed that I am not to joke about her joining the throngs of the unemployed because a stay-at-home mom is NOT unemployed. And apparently, I am NOT funny.

So tonight was the first official work day that Ruanita did not go to work. One would think that, with both of us at home at night, we would be an organized duo. That we would be be a lean, mean, coordinated team. A couple of detail-oriented dynamos. Two minds are better than one, right? Umm....theoretically, that should be the case. But this is Ruanita and me we are talking about here. Theory and reality do not always mesh where we are concerned.

This afternoon, we took the kids to Target to buy their school supplies. We forked over our nearly $100 for pencils and crayons and markers and Kleenex and hand sanitizer and paper plates and printer paper and Clorox wipes and hand soap and all the other necessities the school budget no longer covers. We then bagged them up neatly, with the intention of taking them to school with us this evening for the twins' kindergarten Open House.

All day we had been talking up the Open House to Sophie and Nicholas, who have been decidedly less than excited about the arrival of the new school year. You're going to meet your teacher. You're going to meet the kids who will be your new BFF's. You're going to get to see your classroom. Today is an exciting day! Open House was scheduled from 5:00 until 7:00 this evening. Ever early to a fault, we arrived at school at precisely 5:00pm on the dot, with the intention of getting in and getting out before the masses arrived. The kids' classroom door was shut, but the door was unlocked. We knocked and then peeked our heads in to say hello. The classroom was empty. We waited in the hall for a while, thinking maybe their teacher had stepped out for a soda break...or a cigarette...or a fifth of vodka. You know, whatever chemical comfort kindergarten teachers need to get through the day.

After about ten or fifteen minutes, we noticed that there was not another living soul in the building. We began to think that perhaps we were off on the time. Perhaps we had read wrong and the Open House did not start until 5:30. We decided to take the kids outside to play on the playground for a bit as we waited for other parents and kids to arrive.

It was hot. I began to sweat within seconds of settling myself on the uncomfortable metal bench overlooking the playground. The playground at the kids' school sits directly in the sunlight. Not an inch of shade to be found anywhere on the playground. After a few minutes, Ruanita and I decided it was more than we could handle and we dragged the kids, against their will, back into the air conditioned school.

As 5:30 rolled around, we were still the only human beings in the building. Hmmm...perhaps we made an error of some sort? Not having a smartphone (disclaimer: thinly veiled Christmas gift hint), I do not have 24-hour, portable access to the internet. So I could not check the school calendar online. We decided to drive home and check the time on the paperwork we received from the kids' school. I sat in the car with the kids as Ruanita ran in to grab the paperwork. Sure enough, we had made a mistake. Not only were we off on the time, but we had the date completely wrong. The kindergarten Open House was not at 5:00 today. It is at 6:00 tomorrow. How did we make a mistake like that? We had wasted forty minutes of our evening. The kids were actually dressed in presentable clothing. Their hair had been combed. Their teeth had been brushed. To the untrained eye, they looked like perfectly pleasant children. It is not often that our children are dressed to the nines, so we decided to take advantage. We did the only thing we could think of in that particular circumstance.

We went out for Mexican food.