Thursday, September 02, 2010

My Disability

It has come to my attention from a loyal reader that I have been slacking off on my daily blogging. I was thrilled to learn that someone...anyone...actually read my blog on a daily basis and missed it when I did not post. However, I do apologize for disappointing my singular fan. Please let me explain the reason for my slacking. In the past, I have typically done my blogging in the morning at work. I like to think of myself as a professional writer since I get paid to write. Never mind that my employer is completely unaware that they are paying me to write. I am writing whilst getting paid...therefore I am a professional, right? However, my place of employment has recently cracked down on our non-work-related internet usage. Therefore, I have had to become covert and sneaky in my attempts to blog at work. Anyone who knows me knows that I am a terrible sneak. Sneakiness stresses me out. Covertness gives me hives. I sit here typing, terrified that someone is going to walk up behind me and ask me what I am doing. I am not a good liar. When lying, I tend to overcompensate...overexplain things. Anyone with a single working brain cell could see right through my lies. Therefore, I have cut back considerably on my blogging while at work.

So why don't I just blog at home? Perhaps at night after I put the kids to bed? I do write at home occasionally. However, I find that I am not nearly as witty or creative at home....if you even consider me witting and creative at all. After putting in six mind-numbing hours at work and then another eight or so at home with my adorable, albeit exhausting, children, I find that I don't have a single thing to say. Once my kids are in bed, I collapse into my favorite chair and vegetate. I enjoy the silence. I don't turn on the TV. I may surf the web, but even the sound of my fingers striking the keys annoys me. My mind is a blank slate...incapable of forming a coherent thought until I finally take my fatigued butt upstairs to bed.

So I need to work on my evening creativity. I need to learn to form a thought in my head past 1:00pm in the afternoon. I am absolutely a morning person. I am most creative in the morning. I am happiest in the morning. I feel the most alive in the morning. This is my disability. Please bear with me while I learn to adjust to being disabled. Please be patient while I try to train my geriatric brain to function in the evening. I truly appreciate your support.


Shari said...

Problem solved. Write it at work, send to your home email, copy/paste into the blog once you fall out on the couch :)

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