Wednesday, June 30, 2010

My Son, The Schmoozer

Living in a family that is predominantly female, I had always hoped that my sons would grow up learning to appreciate and respect women in much the same way that my brother, Matt, did growing up in an all-female household. I did not, however, anticipate that they would become quite so adept at "handling" women...especially at such an early age. I think I am raising a couple of ladies' men. Tonight, as I was tucking Lucas into bed, he looked at me completely sincerely and said, "Momma, you look a little skinnier tonight. You look pretty." Ok...first of all, I do not look skinnier. I have done nothing but pack on pounds for the last six months. Standing in the boys' bedroom in a huge old Hawaiian print t-shirt, no bra, and men's basketball shorts that are way too big, I was not exactly the picture of femininity. In no way did I look "skinnier" or "pretty." So...what possessed my son to say that? Apparently, he has discovered my hot button (my weight) and was pressing it with wanton abandon tonight. He did not want anything from me at that time. He did not ask me for a single thing after that. I can only surmise that he is accumulating brownie points for some future request. He may not even know what that future request will be at this point in time. But he is "handling" momma. He is buttering me up. He is schmoozing me. Merriam-Webster defines schmoozing as, "to chat in a friendly and persuasive manner, especially as to gain favor, business, or connections." Lucas has no interest in my business or connections, but he sure has a vested interest in gaining my favor. Too bad for the little schemer that I am onto him. I can see right through his devious shenanigans. That's right buddy....don't try telling me I am skinny! Momma knows better than that!

On that note, I am going to have some ice cream....cookies and cream, I believe.


Jessica said...


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