A Change in Plans

As many of you know, I have been knee-deep in the throes of wedding planning for the last couple of months. I have reached out to many of you to “save the date” and have shared our plans with some of you. I have been researching venues, spending entirely too many hours on my wedding page on Pinterest and sending numerous emails from one far end of the Twin Cities to the other.

All of that is coming to an end.

Ruanita and I have decided that we are not going to have an elaborate wedding. As a matter of fact, we have decided—after sixteen years and three kids together—to go our separate ways. We are separating.

Just kidding!

Wouldn’t THAT be a kick in the ass, huh? No, we are not breaking up. And we still have every intention of getting married, but we have decided to downscale our wedding plans a bit.

Here’s the thing. We are both in our forties (me just barely…her more thoroughly entrenched). We have three children who suck every penny (not to mention the very life) out of us. We have a mortgage. A hefty new car payment. College to think about (should any of our children prove industrious enough to graduate high school). Hell, we are still paying off last year’s trip to the beach!

In short, we are not two twenty year olds just starting out without a care or responsibility in the world. We are grown-ups responsible for providing a good life to the three little people who inhabit our house. If you know either of our families, you know there are no inheritances coming our way. Neither of our parents could lend us five bucks at this point.

Also, planning a wedding is stressful. I was entirely too into it while Ruanita was less than excited. Our divergent excitement level was putting undue stress on our relationship. Planning the wedding had become a chore rather than a joy.

So…rather than placing ourselves in greater debt for a large-scale wedding that would only stress me out and cause Ruanita a great deal of mental anguish, we have decided to scale back.

Here is our new wedding itinerary (we are keeping our original wedding date as we know some people are already making plans to make the great Northern migration to Minneapolis that weekend):

Friday, June 20, 2014:

6:00PM - Texas Hold ‘Em Poker tournament at our house. Snacks and beverages provided. $10 buy-in. Winner takes all! (**DISCLAIMER*** My family members are hard core poker players. There is a real probability that you will be called a bitch or a bastard at some point during the tournament. Please plan accordingly.) If you don’t play poker, you are still welcome to eat our food and drink our beer and make fun of the gamblers.

Saturday, June 21, 21014:

10:00AM - Private wedding ceremony with just the immediate family (location to be determined). This would be the perfect opportunity for our out-of-town friends to hit the Mall of America.
11:00AM - Private wedding lunch with just the immediate family (location to be determined)
4:00PM - “I Do” Barbecue at our house (catered, of course, as we are NOT cooking on our wedding day). Good food! Cold beer! Great friends! Shorts and flip-flops welcome.

Sunday, June 22, 2014:
11:00AM – Bagels at our house. Chance to say good-bye to all of our out-of-town friends.

So there you have it. Rather than having a fancy, elaborate wedding, we will be getting our redneck, hillbilly party on! We may even get some cornhole action going. It's a little more "us" than a formal affair. Though the wedding ceremony itself will be an intimate, family-only event, we truly hope that you all will join us for the other weekend festivities.

Especially you out-of-towners we adore and so seldom see!