Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Podiatric Problems

I have to go back to the podiatrist. Since running on the treadmill shortly after getting out of my walking cast (stupid, stupid, stupid girl!), I have had nearly constant pain in my foot. The pain is greater than it ever was prior to my wearing the cast. I expected the pain would ease up over time. Rather, it is getting worse. I am beginning to fear that I may very well have fractured it when I tried running. Freaking great.

I am, however, developing a new found respect for those who suffer from fibromyalgia and other pain disorders. How the hell do you live with constant pain, day in and day out? I have only been dealing with it for a couple of weeks, and I am a complete mess. My pain is not excruciating. I am not breaking out in a sweat and screaming uncontrollably. Mine is more of a irritation....a debilitating annoyance....just enough pain to put me in a foul mood. I find myself being crabby and short with Ruanita. My patience with the kids is nearly non-existent. I fuss at them more than I should. I hate my job. I have little tolerance for people, in general. I feel like doing nothing but eating all the time. If I am going to hurt anyway, I may as well hurt with a mouthful of sour cream and onion Ruffles, right? I always thought I had a healthy pain threshold, but I have discovered these last few weeks that I am a wimp. A lightweight. All it takes it a sore foot to push me over the edge and wreak havoc in my world.

In my defense, a functional foot is fairly necessary when it comes to performing one's day to day activities. Actually, I think I could function much better if my foot were merely removed. I could learn to use a prosthesis. However, as it stands, I am working with a pretty useless appendage at the end of my leg. I find myself avoiding simple tasks because I just do not want to walk on my foot. Something as seemingly harmless as walking to the bathroom hurts. However, I do not recommend trying to hold it...not only is that bad for your bladder, but tightly squeezed thighs are not conducive to concentration...particularly at work.

So...for my sake of my marriage, my waistline, my children's self-esteem, and my bladder health...I need to call my podiatrist.


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